Doubting in my faith.

When I Doubt...

Some time a few months back, I was depressed. Everything just doesn't seem to go as what I would want it to be. Problems just seems to be all around and there's nothing I can do. It seems during that time that everybody was against me and even when I've prayed for wisdom, no answer was forthcoming. I begin to doubt myself and question God. Why is this happening?

For those well meaning friends, they might recommend forgetting about those problems, which is easier said than done. As with the friends of Job, we might also hear those same reasonings. We are guilty of some unconfessed sin. It is God's judgement upon us. Maybe one would, like Job's wife, tell you to "Curse God and die." (Job 2:9) More recent way of thinking will tell you that those are just trials which we are subjected to, so that we may learn to trust in the Lord and that our faith may grow. Its been half a year and all those things that went wrong turned out right. Its only in the end that one sees the purpose of events that have happened. Oh, there are still things that goes wrong or at least I thought its wrong. But I've learned to see things from a different perspective. God has plans for us though we can't see what it is. I've come to understand that everything has its time. Wait patiently for Him and that He makes all things beautiful, in its time.

Whatever the reason, whatever the suggestion given by friends, some things we find out:

You get to find out who your real friends are.
You get to know what your friends really think about you.
You find out what really goes on on your mind when you start thinking about what to do.
You find out how strong your faith really is.
But the bottom line is, You find out how faithful God really is.

For my friends who lent an ear, Thanks for being there.

If it should happen that you have a friend who has a problem, one nice advice that I would like to share was chanced upon a magazine while I was visiting a friend. While browsing it, an article about doubts caught my eye. It contained a quotation from a book by Daniel Taylor entitled The Myth of Certainty.

"In my humanity I may..

        despair or even rage against God. At that point you must

        believe for me. Do not insist that I believe. Do not whip

        the mule that has collapsed under the burden. Do what you

        can to lighten the burden and wait patiently until I have

        regained my strength. And someday I will do the same for

        you."

Oct 7, 1998